Empty promises...

Don't you just hate it when someone promises you something and in the end, just forget all about it?

Well, i do. I mean like..if you're not sure whether you can fullfill that task, then do not promise anything. It's really annoying to look forward to something, then in the end just to find out that you've been keeping your hopes high like a fool waiting for that something and not getting it.

I've been doing a lot of thinking. And i seriously mean A LOT!

Been here for a year already. Haven't really made much good friends. Just those come and go friends. I just realized that you can't really trust people here no matter how good they are to you. They'll practically just ditch you for something. A friend wouldn't ditch you no matter under what circumstances. A friend won't leave you in the dark waiting for him to fullfill his promises and in the end, just ditch you because he's having a night out with girls that he met the night before.

It's been a while since i've lost my temper. I mean like really lost my temper. I've been playing it cool ever since i got here. I don't know how much longer can i stand being a different person. I hate lying to myself. I hate acting every single day trying to be Mr Goody just to avoid certain confrontation.

Funny thing about the outside world is that, no matter how much you contribute, how much easier you make things for others, how good you treat others, they will eventually take advantage of you. Somehow, one way or another, most of what i had encounter here just seems to come down to this conclusion.

Oh well, what can i say? Life goes on..

I'm on my own here trying to cope with every single day. Sometimes when shit happens, i really don't know who to turn to. I get scared myself despite being 18. These are the times where you wish you're not 18. But then there's this little voice in my head telling me that these are the things that makes you stronger in life if you can overcome it.


Those little voice in my head are just plain lies.


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